Brenda Wilbee's "Living With Ravens": #12: Freedom Gifts: Learning To Let Go

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

#12: Freedom Gifts: Learning To Let Go

Contributed by my dear friend Nita Maas. Thanks for letting me post it!

Kent

I watched the school door close behind Kent this morning. As I turned to retrace my steps home, I thought how far I had come in realizing Kent is growing up. I had cared for him since he was six weeks old until he was three. Then Brad and Carol and he had left for Japan. Three years there. Three years in Kuwait. Back to Virginia when Kent was nine. No longer three. It hasn't been easy to not be that super-vigilant grandma of the past. It hasn't been easy letting Kent "go."

"Hi," I greeted one of Kent's friend's dads as I caught up with him on the sidewalk. It seemed so natural to tell him what I'd been thinking about. He listened as we walked together. Then he told me how he and his wife were dealing with the "letting go." They had given their daughter a bike. They had given their son a watch with a phone and tracking device. He called them their "freedom gifts."

Freedom gifts!!! My heart leaped up and up and up! Was that what I was giving Kent by not hovering? Was I giving him a freedom gift? Was I helping him grow into the young man he was meant to be?

If I can give Kent that gift of freedom, can I give it to others in my life?

Can I....can I give it to myself?

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ABOUT "LIVING WITH RAVENS"

Reflections For Women Living In the Hard Places

Remember Elijah? He’s the Old Testament chap God assigned to take on the prevailing god Baal, a rather nasty sort. God of rain, fertility, and harvest, Baal demanded the sacrifice of babies in massive bonfires. Rituals involved eating feces. To shatter this illusion of power that came at such a high cost, God sent Elijah to tell King Ahab there wouldn't be rain until God said so. The people needed to know who was in charge--Jehovah God, who freely gave. The response from King Ahab and Queen Jezebel was less than embracing.

Elijah ran pell-mell for the desert to hide in the stony outcroppings of Cherith. All he’s got is a crummy little creek cutting through the stone of a beastly hot desert. Oh, yes, the ravens. Foul, glossy black these things, eating nothing all day but road kill. Yet in Elijah’s extreme deprivation and isolation and fear pummeling his gut, the ravens became God’s saving grace. They brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening. Who would have thought that carrion-eating birds could be a man’s only hope of survival? It’s almost offensive. At times, it feels offensive. But then, sometimes that’s what grace looks like.

I know. Not what we want. We want “cured,” “livable wages,” “love,” "restoration." We want the window when the door slams shut. We want so many things--except ravens. So it's easy to dismiss what God sends—we don't even see these creative gifts of grace in the chaos of our fear, grief, despair, and gut-wrenching loneliness.

LIVING WITH RAVENS is for women stuck in their own kind of Cherith. Perhaps some of my own reflections of God intervening in difficulties will resonate with others who face similar challenges.